you're nobody until you're talked about.: We had too much time, too much us, so we fought like tomorrow was promised.

I admit that I'm still watching the days go by

& sleeping alone is starting to break me down.

Straight up - I don't understand how I'm single when I look this good on a daily basis.

My roomates cat waits for me in the kitchen every night around suppertime. He sits at my feet while I cook my food and stares up at me with his sad kitty eyes that say "my life will be complete if you accidentally drop a crumb of your dinner onto the ground or if you're feeling generous tonight then please place your plate within my reach while you go to answer your phone." What this cat doesn't seem to realize is that I've said no to much cuter boys in my life - he has no hope of me feeling sorry for him and sharing my delicious lemonand dill flavored salmon dinner with him. I'm glaring at him in between writing these sentences hoping he realizes that the look I'm giving him is the exact same look I give the rest of them... better luck next time.

Ever wonder how long it takes for salmon to mold?

- One week.

I didn't realize how sneaky cats can be - I definitely didn't give my roomies cats much credit on the intelligence scale. I thought cats were just balls of fur, complete with a tiny brain somewhere amongst the fluff. I was wrong.

I left a bag of bread on the counter last week. When I came home I found it completely torn apart and three pieces missing from the bag. It's still a mystery how the cat got onto the counter - I can hardly crawl onto the counter myself and as tiny as I am, a cat is still about 1/10 of my size. Maybe all cats can jump three feet onto any given surface - I'm not sure. I've only had hamsters as pets and those things can't get up a single stair let alone onto a counter.

Anyways, after work I made two pieces of salmon, one for supper and one for lunch the next day. My mom always tells me to let my food cool before I put it in the fridge so I whipped up a plate of corn and salmon to take upstairs to eat and put my other piece of salmon on a plate to cool down. I figured the entire plate would be demolished by one of the furry demons I live with if I just laid it on the table, so I put it on top of the fridge where I knew it'd be safe. At work the next say I was super confused when I looked in my bag and my delicious salmon concoction was no where to be found. I figured it must be in the fridge at home. I looked in the fridge when I get home aaaaand.... nothing! I'm pretty scatterbrained at moments - sometimes more often then not. I figured my scatterbrained self must of either eaten both pieces of salmon the night before or someone grabbed it from the fridge for their own lunch. Whatever, no big deal - I had more important things to worry about, like finding matching socks for work the next morning. I've decided it looks more professional when I take off my shoes at work and both socks are black as opposed to an obnoxiously bright hello kitty sock on the right foot and a lime green and black stripped one on the left.

The next week I ran into my roomie and she politely points above the fridge and asks if I'm conducting a science experiment of some sort - there was my salmon, presumably cooled off by now, and I think it was sprouting an eyeball or leg or something on the top of it. Maybe the cats aren't as smart as I gave them credit for because they still stared as interested in the molding salmon as they had one week before. Or maybe they were silently mocking me from trying to outsmart them.

I've been getting some really good questions on my formspring page - ones that make me think, debate and then think some more before I can begin to answer them.

"Do you miss anyone from your past?"

Well, do you want a simple answer or a long explanation?

Simple : Yes.

Explanation : Yes, of course I miss people from my past. Anyone who's ever been a part of my life has contributed to who I am today. Some of them I love and appreciate greatly for this. And some of them I hate a tiny bit and resent.

People drift apart for different reasons but it can usually be narrowed down to two main ones. People grow and change and then drift away. Or people refuse to grow and change and then inevitably, you drift apart.

I miss spending every weekend at Robins. I miss sushi dates. I miss speeding to Calgary, spur of the moment, after Hinder guest listed us for their show that night. I miss her amazing, inappropriate work stories about what her patients shoved up where that day -always told at the least appropriate times. I miss spending three hours getting ready, going out at midnight and home at 5am - no longer looking like we spent half the night primping our hair and painting our faces. Now, she's engaged. The last time I saw her was before Christmas. I don't know when I'll see her next. I miss Heather and being able to run across the street to her house. I miss looking forward to seeing her at Christmas, and summer and sometimes for a third time if I'm really spoiled that year. I miss taking her to Ikea for her first time and buying almost the entire store, only to realize half of what we bought didn't fit in her car. I miss the handwritten letters we wrote to each other religiously for the past 12 years. I don't know when I'll get to her next.

I miss Aaron. I miss him being the first person I message in the morning and the last person I message before I go to bed. I miss falling asleep next to him and waking up to his messy hair and sleepy face. I miss LA, when I looked at him one moment and thought, how did I get this lucky. We broke up, and I still don't know why. I wonder if he's already waking up to someone new. I don't know if I'll ever see him again. I miss Nicole and Erica. I miss road trips to Calgary with them. The cabin weekend. Every memory I have of the three of us at Nikki's. How every time we were together the night ended with epic quotes to reminisce over the next morning. I don't know if the three of us will ever be in the same room together again. I miss Brandy. Hitting up every concert possible - always ending our night on the tour bus, making new friends, listening to completely random stories. Being classy and making fun of everyone being trashy. I miss her driving from Banff to Edmonton to pick me up at 5am without thinking twice when I needed to get away more then anything. Roadhouse. Photosesh's. Ice Bat. My grandma's basement. Picking up a hitchiker - for no other reason but because we could. I miss all the plans we had to take over the world by storm with Rock Muses. I don't know when I'll see her next. I miss summer nights at Shauns. Staying up too late watching movies. Hot tub nights. Quadding and getting stuck in a mud swamp. Him staying with me in Chicago. His family. He has a girlfriend now. I don't know when I'll see him next. I miss Takota. I miss her weekly Edmonton visits. Making panini's for us when we get home for the night. Gossip sesh's in my room. Driving in her convertible with no destination in mind. Her knowing she always will get stuck opening up my window in the mornings after our adventures, because she sleeps closer to my window then I do. All she does is work now. I don't know when I'll see her next.

I miss Candice. I miss gossiping with the girls at Earls. At Joeys. At Costa Blanca. I miss Kayla. I miss Brit. I miss Calvin. I miss Maegan. I miss Chris. Marley. Leah. Kachine. Brit. Larissa. I miss Terese. I miss Victoria. Brett. Dustin. Spencer. I miss Mitch, Braxton, and Fez. I miss girls night. I miss so many more people, but it's not necessary to name them all.

Every. single. one. of these people hold a place in my life. Some big, some small. Regardless of how often I talk to them or if I even talk to them anymore at all, I never forget about them. I couldn't forget any of them even if I tried. And I wouldn't want to. Some of those people have been there for the best times of my life - the times that I will look back on later on in life and start off by saying "Man, remember that time when we... - that was one of the best nights of my life"

People change. And some people never do. There's only two options - you either grow together, or grow apart. I truly believe that these people were in my life at the exact time they were meant to be there. I also believe the people that are in my life now are the ones who are meant to be in it right now - I wouldn't trade them for anything.

So back to the question, yes. Yes I certainly do miss people from my past.

I'll leave you with this - I just ate half of the 3 pound bag of candy hearts that Brittney got me for Valentines Day. I'm about to either go into a candy coma or start vomitting up pastel colored sugar.